A Confederation, of Owls, Hawks, and, Crows.

These birds used to laugh up their sleeves, or in their feathers, at men trying to imitate, with their mouths, what they did with their bills, the birds’ calls of love to their mates. But, these birds have found that: "he would laughs last, laughs best; for men have fooled them out of their socks, by the use of their mouths to blow air through instruments, they have invented, whose call of love, makes their hearts sick for each other. So, away to the call of love they fly, to bill feathers, hop around and google eye each other; but, alas for them, they find the love call is only a snare of men to put a bullet through their bodies to cause death.

They first listen individually, from a group of their kind, but only one would answer the call, so they waited. The owls looked wise, the hawks, sharp; but the crows eyed the others. Soon, across the way, in another strip of woods, the low caw of a crow was heard, which made all the crows lift up their bills, with one ear near the shoulder and the other toward the crow call. After a while, each said that he didn’t know. Then they asked the owl: "is it a man or crow?" The owl scratched his ear with a claw, shook his feathers and said: "I don’t know, but it sounds like a crow that I killed and ate." This made the crows mad, so one crow said: "I hear that crow call. ‘I am not love sick, but I am curious to know whether it is crow or man.’" So away he flew and got killed for his curiosity.

As he fell to the ground the crows caw-cawed, but the owl said: "Never mind, I’ll eat him tonight." So the crows were quiet, but a hawk call, low and plaintive, was heard from another way. The crows bobbed their heads and whispered: "now we will see what those hawk-bill hawks will do. ‘We wonder if one of them must die to find out whether it is hawk or man.’" The call continued and the hawks began to fidget. No one was certain. The owls had no advice and the crows were mum. Finally, a hawk said: "I will fly the other way, sweep away around, and come up on the blind side to that hawk, my bride." They waited and waited, and, then they saw a speck coming to him in the air over the call. Then it began to circle, with the glad hawkcry of a mate found. Then every male hawk wailed: "I wish I were he." Then they saw feathers fly, the hawk drop and, heard the sound of a gun. Then they knew the call was from a man. The owl said: "I can’t eat both crow and hawk tonight. ‘I’ll find my mate to help me.’" So when the sun quit shining and the moon began, the owl said: "I’ll call first and let her come to me." So he let out an owl hoot for his mate. Sure enough, a mile away, his mate answered. He hooted back, for he was talking to himself: "if that crow and hawk had had my sense, they would not be our meat tonight." Then he heard the call of his mate much nearer. The crows and hawks said: "this old owl has sense ---- too wise to get shot like we did." When the owl heard this, it pleased him so well that he whooped out a loud hoot. Then a streak of fire was the answer and a dead owl, the result.

So after a time the owls, hawks, and crows, made a con federation for mutual protection against the call of man to exterminate their kind. So, in a convention they assembled, to devise ways and means of staying on the earth.

One old owl said: "Exterminate man. That will do."----voted down. A hawk said: "Go where man is not."----voted down. Then a crow said: "Jay birds are like us crows, only smaller, and not black. Make a truce with them to warn us, when men are out with guns and call an understanding that you hawks and owls, will quit eating them and crows to suck their eggs no more. The Jay birds must agree on their part to keep an eye on man. So the trade was made and the contract signed, and the Jay birds scattered themselves among men, and some to the woods, far from the haunts of men.

At the crack of day one morning, screaming Jay birds were flying in an out, in great excitement as the men, who shot owls, crows, and hawks for sport, left the city with Jay birds all around them. The men were hard put to understand their Jay bird notoriety. Soon cars from the city, rushed up, with men yelling: "you fellows, leave our Jay birds alone. ‘Where are you going with our Jay birds?’" "To the timber over yonder, to call up, and shoot hawks, owls, and crows." "No you wont. Do you see that big flock of them flying the other way as though Satan were after them?" When the Jay birds saw this, they calmed down and flew back to town. Then the men who overtook the hunting party remarked: "you gunmen with your call tricks had better follow the Jay birds, for the crows, hawks, and owls have left the country, because of you and the Jay birds.

When the news of the situation leaked out in town the hunters became the butt of Jay bird jokes. This made them mad. So they got together, to find the cause, and decided to slip out that night to the woods to stand out in open moonshine, gunless, to call up an owl and learn the cause. So they went; not a Jay bird stirred for they were all asleep on their roosts. Lest their number would frighten, only one man went to call an owl. After many calls, the man saw an owl walk up. The man said: "You scare me. ‘Why not come by wing?" "I notice that you fellows shoot owls on the wing, so I use my feet." "Now, Mr. Owl, why did the Jay birds follow us yesterday and you fellows leave the country?" "Well, as you have no gun and seem to be ashamed of yourself, I’ll tell you for a consideration. You will turn over to us all your instruments that you use to call us to our deaths with." The man said: "I’ll see my partners and give you our decision three days hence." So the man told his fellows, the term, to rid them of the Jay bird joke. The men agreed to accept the terms. But, on their way home, they came to the Jay bird roosts. They stoped, and, getting mad again, they shot six cartridges into the roosts. Jay birds fell and Jay birds flew. One flew but fell near the owl; who said: "what’s the news?" "The news is; that we are shot to pieces, for warning you owls, yesterday." The owl said: "come to the convention tomorrow."

Now, as the owl walked off through the woods, a screech owl, chasing a rat, which darted near and was caught by the bir owl. The small owl said: "why don’t you fly over the woods, rout out a rabbit, and leave the rats to me?" "I am afraid to fly, lest I be shot." "I heard guns a while ago; any owls dead?" "No, but a lot of Jay birds are killed, because they warned us, when the men came our way, to blow our love song, to draw us near to be shot." "What are the Jay birds going to do about it?" "They are to meet us, owls, hawks, and crows, tomorrow. Do you want to come?" "No, those of you who don’t eat me, suck my eggs. ‘Give me my rat!’" "Come and take it!" "You old son of an owl! ‘You’ve eaten it!"

When tomorrow came, folks said to the hunters: "It seems that the Jay birds are not around you fellows,-- none in town." One farmer said: "I saw a lot of them flying to the big swamp." Another man said: "that I noticed too. ‘All of the crows, owls, and hawks went that way too." Another said that he saw all of the rabbits doing the same. Then one said: "why don’t you hunters, take your mouth organs and slip over there, chant your whistles and call them out to death?" "Especially the Jay birds." One hunter, said: "keep your lip to your self. ‘Jay birds have lost their bills by trying to bill our busness, and your lip might get you hurt."

When the bird hour arrived for their counsel, each kind showed up. They were all intact, But the Jay birds, had received many wounds. One had lost a bill, another a foot, tail feathers, top-knot, and claws which had been shot away. The Jays reported that they had withdrawn from the league, but had brought the rabbits along to take their place. When asked to give their method, the rabbits said: "When these hunters start out, the first rabbit will squeak and on till they squeak under you, then you will know, when you hear it near, you will understand." The crows voted to take the rabbits, for they laid no eggs, and Jay birds did. The Jay birds replied: "We prefer a crow’s bill in our nests, to a man’s bullet in our bodies. The hawks said: "Take the rabbits. ‘We how to catch and eat Jay birds, and, this will please the hunters. So the Jays were out and the rabbits in, by a two thirds majority.

When the owls woke up, and were told, fuss and feathers started. Every owl began to hoot, "Who-who-who-who’s smoke-house are you fooling with?" "Ever since Adam had a house-cat, Rabbit has been our meat. ‘But rather than be shot by those Jay bird white men, we will eat Jay birds, rats, mice, and, grass-hoppers." So the Jay birds got a solid vote to go out and the rabbits to come in. So, all of the Jay birds left; that is, all except the sick ones. Soon they entered the owl and hawk business. As they were eaten, the terror of their cries sped the wings of their fellows.

Now, after the hawks and owls had feasted and the crows fasted, the rabbits darted under anything to hide. A crow asked them: "What are you hiding from?" "Owls." They replied, "Come out. ‘If an owl glutton eats one of you, we crows will gather in armies, and pick him clean, down to his wing and tail feathers.’ ‘We swapped Jay birds for you because they lay eggs and you don’t.’ ‘We made a good trade; so hop out and be bold about it; for hawks and owls must let you alone.’ ‘If you could lay eggs, we would not have traded the Jay birds for you, for your eggs would be bigger; and if you would lay eggs as fast as you have little rabbits, rabbit eggs would be so plentiful and crows so full of them, that we would be ashamed to look a rabbit in the face.’ ‘So, 500 or all of you rabbits, go to that open field, cover an acre or so of ground, and about 5000 of us crows will make a thick black circle around you.’ ‘Then we will have a lots of owls and hawks to swoop around and fly over you, to test your nerves.’ So when the rabbits had covered an acre of ground and the crows were thick around them, they told the rabbits to lie still and hawks and owls to swoop down. Then the trees were beaten with wings. Then here came a cloud of wings, hooting owls, and screaming hawks. Then bedlam broke loose. Rabbits shot out, crows flew up, rabbits killed crows and each other like bullets through the air. This was caused by owls and hawks screaming terror and death at them. The owls and hawks made a circle, and lit on trees and looked town on the dying mass of fur and feathers and said: "That beats the massacre of the Jay birds and not a man in it. ‘We can’t eat all the dead rabbits, much less the dead crows. Let’s drop down and take a rabbit apiece, and give our buzzard call, to have them to clean up the field.’" So an owl gave the right hoot, loud and long, and the buzzards came; some low, and others high in the sky. They would close their wings and drop with terrific speed, open their wings and make a circle, turn, and light on a dead crow, making feathers fly. When the feast was over the field was covered with bones, fur and feathers. After the buzzards had wiped their bills on a dead limb, they said: "This beats any dead cow or horse for the eating, the room is so much larger. ‘Let’s join these birds, to eat up their dead.’ ‘Agreed!’" So, one of them flew over and lit so that his scent would go the other way, and said: "We buzzards desire to join your bird confederation to eat up your dead." They got this answer: "We have a lot of rabbits who have agreed to warn us when the three hunters come after us with their guns and calling machinery. ‘If the rabbits fail us, we will let you know.’ ‘But, we will say now that we don’t care for your buzzard odor, but we do prefer it to death." So the bunch scattered.

After a season, when the Jay bird joke on the men had lost its sting, they said to one another: "It would do us good to go out, and kill some owls, hawks and crows, to even up what they caused us to suffer from that Jay bird joke. I am fighting mad to hear a jay make his call. If we should start, and the Jay birds too; we’d shoot Jay birds to our last shot, which would be a worse joke on us than the first. I tell you fellows, I am as sore as a boil on this Jay bird business." "We are too;" the others said. "But, we saw some men leave town with guns, and no jays were around them." So they agreed to take their guns and whistles and to start at crack of day for a big swap.

On the edge of town they asked: "Any Jay birds around?" The answer was: "None." Then they met a man, who told them that the Jay birds had come out of the league of birds, because they had shot them on the roost. One said that it was good news, that the owls, hawks, and crows wouldn’t know that they were coming. Another said that it was bad news, because that men would say that they were afraid to tackle the Jay birds in the daytime. The other said that he would gladly sell his whistle and quit the business. Then a rabbit ran by squeaking. When it did this, a dog saw it and gave chase yelping. One of the men, who owned a farm near by, blew his dog whistle, and here came his five hounds, and they took after other rabbits going by, all straight ahead toward the swamp. Then other rabbits right after the dogs, all giving the rabbit cry of distress. One man said: "All this looks suspicious, the Jay birds have quit and the rabbits have their place. ‘I told you so.’ ‘See the cloud of crows, hawks, and owls flying over the hill going the other way, dogs and rabbits, under them, burning the wind?’" ‘Look, men, look!’ ‘Beyond the hill those owls, crows, and hawks are bobbing up and down, like mad hornets fighting something on the ground.’ ‘Run, men, run!’ ‘Don’t you hear the hound howl of distress?’ ‘They are killing our dogs over there, just as we killed the Jay birds.’" One man said as he ran: "Men, if we run over that hill, the owls and hawks will claw us and that army of crows will peck us with their bills, and beat us with their wings, till we’ll be dead, like the Jay birds that we killed." One man said as he ran: "Men, if we run over that hill, the owls and hawks will clean us and that army of crows will peck us with their bills, and beat us with their wings, till we’ll be dead, as the Jay birds that we killed."

By that time a hound came over the hill, howling at every jump and his jumps were as rapid as he could make them, or a little quicker, for stark terror gave speed to his legs and throat. As the claws of an owl were through his hide, between his ears and his wings giving the hound more speed to reach his home, and as the hound sailed over the fence and shot under the house, the owl withdrew his claws and sailed on over the house, and the other dogs tore out and under, in like manner. So three owls and three hawks flew on away out of danger. They lit in a big green white-oak tree. After looking wise a while, an owl said: "Those rabbits gave us enough glory for one day." Another said: "I didn’t a hound could run faster than I could fly, but I felt him pulling on my claws as we shot by the men." A hawk said: "That’s easy to know. ‘If you had been as scared as the hound you would have pulled the skin of his head over his eyes with your speed."

After the men got their mouths shut and their eyes normal, they looked far away and saw flocks of owls, hawks, and crows going over the horizon, and rabbits scampering back the way they had come. The men sat down for a conference. Finally, one said: "This thing of playing females to owls, hawks, and crows is a low down sport. Sport! Fudge and tom-cats! We never will hear the last of that Jay bird joke. Now here’s this rabbit joke sure to leak out, and no way to turn it." Another of the men cut his heel on the ground, spit on the grass, and replied: "So you feel like those howling hounds under that house do you?" "I will give you five cents for your whistle and you can return your borrowed gun." So the nickel and whistle were exchanged. But when the man got back to town and took the gun home, the owner said that he would like to borrow the hawk caller. But when he had finished speaking the man had gone.

The two men on the hill felt that life was a vain thing to fellows like themselves. Their consciences hurt for shooting the Jay birds on their roosts, for being untrue to their word to the hawks, crows, and owls. Furthermore, they would have this present calamity on them; they had lost a partner, so hurt, that he sold out for a nickel. "Say, Bill, those hounds of yours are yelping as though mortal terror has them." When they walked over the hill up to the fence, and called the hounds, all came out with swelled heads between their ears. Then a hen flew over the fence and the dogs thought an owl was after them to ride them to death. The men looked and said: "These dogs are ruined. ‘They will never chase a rabbit, because of their fear that an owl will ride them.’ ‘Let’s walk down the road, count up our cost in the quiet, and no one will know.’ ‘We have lost a man, the birds, our dignity, our hounds, and what have we; but three whistles, and two jokes, that no man can stand against, and keep his selfrespect.’ ‘We were cheated when we bought that hawk call for a nickel.’ ‘Lets go home and face the racket.’"

So they walked on, saying nothing. Pretty soon, Bill said: "I see no rabbits, Jays or anything on our line." Jim snarled back: "Line; we have no line, but a line of trouble." They met a man, who offered them 50¢ for George’s whistle. They sold him the whistles and the hounds, all for $4.00, and then walked on. Bill said: "I feel better Jim. ‘So do I Bill.’" Then George came along and said: "You fellows look better than I feel. ‘Tell me how it’s done.’ ‘George, here is your 45¢. We never go back on an old partner in distress.’"

"What’s your terms for this new contract?" "When anyone says Jay bird or rabbit to you, you say nothing." "All right, I couldn’t say anything, any way." As they passed a store, someone called, "Say, fellow, we heard that the Jay birds let you alone, but that the rabbits cut up worse." "Tell him, Bill." Bill said: "You can’t run that old gag on us, for we sold out to Dick, Tom and Harry. ‘See them.’"

The rabbits scattered back over the country and had peace from owls, because of their contract, and peace from hounds, because of their fear of the owls. The rabbits had great love and respect for the crows, because of their protective watchfulness. As proof of their faithfulness: one day an owl forgot the contract and killed a rabbit. The rabbit saw the owl, high up in the air, but payed no attention. The next thing that he knew, was nothing, for the owl had struck him dead. A crow saw this, and gave the caw for the crows to gather to fight. Now, when a crow hears this caw he also gives it so, that soon all have heard it. Soon all of the crows, far and near were rushing to a common center, cawing as they came. Now the crow that saw the murder, flew down near the owl. The owl said: "Why are you here? Rabbits don’t lay eggs." The crow said: "None of your lip, or bill, that I am an egg thief. ‘We crows will pick you clean of your feathers, to keep honor with the rabbits.’" The owl said: "Stand aside crow, till I eat my rabbit supper." Now, a great number had gathered around to see how crows would keep a contract. The owl saw the black cloud of crows coming, and whipped the air with his wings to out fly the crows. Then the crows changed their caw to: ‘CATCH THAT OWL!’ Soon the owl was beat down, and every feather picked except the tail and wing feathers. Then the crows commanded the owl to fly away and hide his shameful nakedness, do the best that he could, and to kill no more rabbits.

In a day or two another owl found a strange bird deep in a swamp. He eyed the thing with one eye and then he tried the other eye, and said to himself: "This thing has wings, claws, eyes, and a hooked bill, but this thing is too small for an owl like me, and too large to be a runty screech owl. ‘Now, tell me which you are; give some owl hoots." Then the naked thing raised its head, spread its wings, and who-who-who’d. Then the other owl flew high up in the air, and gave the hoot call for all owls to come. Soon, a great crowd of owls were looking at the thing. Finally, one asked: "What are you?" The thing answered: "I was an owl, before the crows picked me." "Why did they pick you?" "Because I killed a rabbit." Then the owl said: "All of you wait here. ‘I’ll fly over and ask the crows for that dead rabbit." So away he flew and gave the peace hoot, and lit down among the crows, and said: "You crows did right to pick that owl because of this dead rabbit. and as the weather is cold, and the rabbit has not spoiled, and as you crows don’t eat meat, and as rabbits lay no eggs and this one has none in it, I ask permission to take this dead rabbit for that thing to live on till his feathers come out." The the owl stepped on the rabbit, sank his claws into it, and flew away, with the rabbit hanging down. When he flew in among his kind, he said: "Come out from under your wing feathers, and live on this dead rabbit, that cost you your feathers. ‘Save those on your wings and tail.’ ‘If the crows had pulled them, you would have frozen to death.’ ‘Live on this rabbit, I say, till your feathers come out, so you can come again among lady owls.’"

Two weeks later, an owl reported that the thing was fuzzy, but that the rabbit was gone, but that he was not starving. The one that reported said: "I think that his wife can see him now and feed him." So it was agreed. When his wife came into his presence, she blushed, but he said: "Stay with me and wait, soon you will have the newest dressed husband owl in town." So she stayed with him and found it so. But the women owls were jealous, and threatened to pick their husbands to get them new clothes. In fact, the men owls had to combine to keep their old feathers.

Now let us go back to the crows and rabbits, when the naked owl left them. The Rabbits said: "You honorable crows have kept your pledge to us, but now, if it pleases you give us the advice that you have been promising us." The crows said: "Your point is well taken, so now we caw, the caw of advisers, and say: "When you run from an enemy, tuck your tails, so your white flag can’t be seen to show where you are going." The rabbits said: "Thank you crows. We will call a counsel, and weigh your advice. So they hopped off half a mile, and met in a briar patch. One rabbit with a bloody ear said: "What’s the use of this? ‘We are in no danger from owls and hawks, and the crows are friendly, for they know we lay no eggs." So they got out in the open and came to order. One rabbit blinked an eye, flapped an ear and struck at a flea, and said: "I move that the crow’s advice be repeated." One rabbit stood straight up on his hind feet and said: "That flea scratching rabbit over there must have a short mind; for the crows said: "You rabbits should tuck your tails when you run, so your white flag can’t show when you go." Another rabbit said: "The words are different, but a tuck tail, was the thing to be done." "But I bet all the fleas that I have, that I can out run any rabbit with his tail down, and, if I win, I am to be rabbit king." It was so ordered and a day set and the crows notified. The agreement was: "No rabbits could practice but their bird partners could." It was also in the closed season for hunting, and somehow the birds found it out. So they flew around, but let chickens alone. So one day a hawk said to an owl: "This coming rabbit race, one tail up and one tail down, is nothing. I bet you a dead rat that I can beat you flying, with my tail down and you may twist your’s any way you mind to." ‘Agreed,’ said the owl, "and if you beat me, a grasshopper is yours." So they lit out, hawk’s tail down and owl’s tail straight out behind. Now, when the owl saw the hawk with his tail down, he got so tickled, that he turned over a few times, laughing, and got beat. On his way back he caught a grasshopper and told the hawk: "You won, but my laugh was worth more than a dead rat." Then the challenged rabbit said: "That owl looks wise, but was foolish to laugh and lose the race. ‘You bet I wont.’" Then a crow spoke to an owl: "What about us trying our tails?" "All right," said the owl. ‘What will you give me, if I beat you?" "I’ll peck a watermellon and let you see the hole, and if you beat me you are not to hoot over me about it." The time was set. Even Harry, Tom, and Dick were there, but there dogs were not because they still had the big head. So the crow and owl were high up on a limb, ready to fly off. So off they went, and the owl was ahead with his tail straight out, so the crow cawed, and both flew back to the limb. "See here crow, I’ll hold my tail down if you wont." "I wont says the crow, for I want to know how it feels to fly that way." You could have asked the hawk, without getting beat by me, to find out. "No down tailed crow can do it." "So tuck your tail and let’s go." So off they flew, but the crow slowed to tuck his tail, and let the owl ahead, who said: "That swift hawk beat me, because I laughed, but this black suck egg crow can’t do it, who stops to tuck his tail." So he beat the crow, who was coming with his tail in his claws. So when the crow flew up, let go his tail to grab a limb, the owl said: "You have lost your hole in the watermellon, but, tell me, why did you claw your tail, all the way over?" "I had to, when I pulled it down with my mind, my wings would stop. What got you ahead was; I stopped to pull my tail down, to grab it with my claws, else I’d have beaten you." "No you wouldn’t. I didn’t stop to laugh at you, is the reason that I beat you." "No it was not. I can hold my tail with one claw and beat you." "No you can’t; for, when I beat a crow once, I never disgrace myself to race with him again." "None of your lip, else I’ll call the crows, and we will pick you clean." "No you wont, for I would hoot the owls, and make you naked." Soon they were hopping mad. The crow cawed and the owl hooted, and here they came together in mid air, to pull feathers. There were two or three more crows than owls, but they didn’t stop to count, but were bent to make naked crows, that day. The rule for both sides was: "All feathers but wing, and tail ones." So, at it they went.

Now the like had not been seen since the crows and rabbits had killed each other through fright and curiosity. Now the men with their owl and crow callers, were on hand, but their guns were in the house, and their hounds under it. The sight of owls were too much for the dogs.

Back yonder, when the owls, crows, and hawks went over the horizon, from the men and hounds, after the rabbit and crow tragedy, and hounds were guided back home, by hawks and owls. Well, after they went over the horizon, they flew on to a lonesome nook in the mountains, to laugh it out of their systems. Directly, a hawk said to an owl: "Those crows are not laughing." One crow said: "Too much rabbit, is the cause." Then a buzzard lit near, and said: "Are we in your league?" "Not yet, but we will vote on you now." So an owl said: "Stop your laughter now, and come to order. These buzzards desire to take the place of Jay birds among us." A hawk said: "I thought the rabbits had that place." A buzzard said: "We are too full on dead rabbits for expression, but we feel that there is not enough of live rabbits left to warn you, when those men start out to woo you to your deaths." A crow asked: "Is not some of your fullness from dead crows, among the dead rabbits?" "No we never eat tough crows, when tender rabbit is near." The crows hopped around and said: "Yes, we crows never eat a buzzard egg, if we can get a clean one. But how will you warn us?" "When you hear the call of the buzzard calling you, look up. If you see us turn a somersault, high up in the air, harden your hearts and head for the horizon." All but the crows said: "That’s fine. Now buzzards, You must promise, that when you see us owls flying by in the night, swinging a dead pig, lamb, or chicken, say nothing about it." The buzzards consulted, and concluded; that all owls and hawks were thieves, and that the crows would pull up corn and steal eggs, and told them so. The others replied: "Your nature is worse. You’d eat a dead man, if you had a chance." "Our buzzard side of this question is strong." "Yes, in scent," a crow said. "Not only that, but because our crowd is equal to two of yours, in name." "How so?" "Because we are buzzards and carrion crows." So they were voted in.

Now back to the crows and owls as they make ready to strip each other in public. All but their sleeves and tails, as it was only a civil war, it was agreed that when one lost his clothes, down to wings and tail, he was to fly away to the mountains, to hide his nakedness, and to fuz and feather again. The buzzards were to circle overhead, as umpires. The hawks were not to feather their nests with crow or owl feathers, and see that all rabbit tails were up. The rabbits were to hold their nerves and see that no Jay bird should interfere.

The old hunters were not present --- too sore from old jokes and losses. When they heard a Jay bird jay, they would say: "It’s unpleasant to us." The new hunters were there by agreement, to bring their dogs, but no guns or whistles. It was also agreed, that only the crow and owl who started the row, were to be on hand ready to fight so when the hour came and things were ready, the crow was to caw and three hundred and two crows were to dash in on wings and strip feathers from owls. The owl was to hoot and 300 owls were to dash in, to make crow feathers fly off the crows. So when all was set and the buzzard, high up in the air, turned over as a signal to fight, they started.

The crow and owl sprang into the air cawing and hooting a roar of wings, made the hounds break loose and beeline for home. The men dashed for cover; the rabbits froze to the ground; and hawks forgot to watch rabbit tails. The first crow and owl, when the others rushed in, had their claws full of feathers from each other, holding on to them, and pulling more feathers by use of their bills. Then the buzzard dropped down, hissing so all could hear: "Let go those feathers in your claws and get more." He then sailed up and circled over them to watch. Owls would dash down with open claws for crow feathers, sweep up and turn them loose. Crows would do the same with owl feathers. Soon a crow yelled out: "Boys, we got their heads naked, but ours aren’t." But the owls said: "Nothing but crow feathers must fly." The men stood up; the rabbits sat on their hind feet; and the hawks said: "We can’t see how rabbit tails are, because of floating feathers." Then a crow flew away to hide his nakedness. Then an owl, then two crows, then an owl, then three crows. The owls yelled: "Come on fellows. We are equal now. Let’s send all of them to the mountains. So when they come back, they will keep their tail out of their claws, to race us. So feathers flew as the contest raged. As the crows grew white and flew away; then a bunch of owls would roll their eyes to follow. Then a crow said to an owl: "Pull this last feather of mine. I want to go." "I won’t," said the owl. "I help no cowardly crow. Keep your feather and fight." But another owl pulled it by mistake, and the crow said: "Goodbye," and left. Then things began to happen thick and fast. A batch of naked owls would leave, and then a bunch of crows. Finally, it got down to nine owls and ten crows. It made the owls madder to see the crows ahead. So they flopped their wings, got above them, and came down on them, ripping breast feathers with one claw and back feathers with the other. So six owls held the four crows, till the other three owls picked them down to fuz. Three of the crows flew away, but the other one, the owls held up, for he was too weak to fly. Then the buzzard dropped down and said: "Put him on my back, and I’ll sail him as a kind act, to a whipped crow." Just as he found the big crowd of naked crows, the buzzard said: "You are the crow that said that my eggs were nasty. When the buzzard returned, the nine owls were cutting the pigeon wing and hooting, what owls they were.

The men were brushing feathers off, the rabbits were happy, until one said: "Those up and down tail rabbits have their race to run, with no practice; while the hawks felt like clawing, but said nothing about it. So the meeting broke up and the farmer came with his plow to turn the feathers under, to enrich the soil. It leaked into town that a stream of naked owls and crows, save wings and tail, were passing toward the mountains.

The old hunters were asked, but knew nothing. A new hunter said that it was a fact. A crow bet an owl that he could beat him flying with his tail down, lost, got mad, and a feather pulling contest was arranged, came off, and this accounted for the naked crows and owls seen. But they could fly. True, for crows and owls, never bet on their and wing feathers. So the old hunter said: "You saw that feather pulling contest." "Yes, and it, alone, was worth your whistles and dogs. But no Jay birds were there.

Now it seems that the owls and crows have a hospital in the mountains to help sprout, and grow feathers. It had an open dale where they could fly for exercise with no limbs to scratch them. It was rather cold, but a level piece of ground, with thick grass which was a bed one bed for all. They form two circles, owls for owls, and crows for crows. The circles are large enough to include each kind, tail to tail, and three deep, with space in the center for a dozen birds.

An owl would sit on the ground at the right place, spread out his tail behind him; and then another owl would sit down on his tail and spread out his tail over the naked back of the other. They’d do this till a circle was formed. Then a like circle would be formed on top of that circle. Then a third circle. But this left a row of naked backs on top. Then the dozen owls would take up leaves with claws and cover the naked backs. Then drop in the hole in the center, snug for the night. Crows would make of themselves a like circle. They had a mineral spring near by, a billful of water would heal all scratches. (It best suited the crows and owls to have one hospital to grow feathers. The crows could nurse in daytime and the owls at night. So they lost no sleep. They never lose their sleep and feathers at the same time.)

One day a wild-cat, thought that he would get him a crow and did, but he never got another, for owls and crows combined to kill a cat, and did, so when the battle was over, the cat entered the owl business, to be a cat no more.

One day they ran out of cat, so one of the owls said: "I’ll bet a handful of gourd seed that the rabbit with an up-tail will win." A crow said: "I had to hold mine down with my claws or stop my wings. A rabbit has no claws, and besides, his tail is too short to reach, between his legs. If he ties his tail down, his skin is so rotten, that he’d strip it. Then it would look like a red worm sticking up. No rabbit could have that and keep his self respect, but would skip to the mountains to reskin his tail." As they could not agree, the rabbits left them and went to bed. Now, to see those owls in bed, to keep warm and sprout feathers would make a cur dog laugh; but not hounds. The owls have the laugh on them. But, it was funny to see three rings of owl eyes, one above the other. When cold, they would turn their necks, and push their head back to warm. When the bend of their necks got cold, they would draw out their heads and bend their necks in. What they lived on while hatching out feathers was a caution. One item of diet was the result of a battle. A crow stepped outside, and a wild cat thought he was a half-grown chicken, and slapped a paw on him, for dinner. The crow cawed for aid, and nothing can get help quicker. A glance of the eye, and the cat was there, covered by 550 crows and owls. Claws, bills, and beaks played in and out, up and down, till the cat was dead. A wiser and deader cat, so, when the fracas was over, they held a council. The crows said: "Cats lay no eggs and there are none in him, so we are out and you owls are in; we want half his worth, in grass-hoppers or bugs." So they agreed to take 139 grass-hoppers and 140 bugs for their cat meat. So 279 owls flew off and came, and paid the crows. So they lived on the strength of that feast for many days.

Gradually, they fuzzed over, and feathered out, which made them decent to go among their kind. So they called in their buzzard and rabbit partners. Crows and owls said: "Buzzard, see if man is out." The rabbits squeaked: "See if the hound dogs are, and if they are, come and turn over above us. So in a few days they saw the buzzard coming, high up in the air, poise himself, and, over he went. Then they all knew that the rabbit race was the next excitement.

So they examined themselves, and decided that in ten days all their feathers would be grown; Then they could hold up their heads. During the ten days wait, they quit piling themselves up like cord wood, to lend to each other their tails for warmth. Those fellows who had to cover the top circle with leaves, and sleep in the hole, said that they were glad, for their claws were not made to tote leaves, and the hole they slept in, had too much owl scent, for they had no feathers on their bodies to wash. So they all flew up in the trees to roost. Away in the night, one owl said to another: "Those pin-feathers that I had, when I set myself to roost are grown now, for I feel respectable, for my bill says that all my feathers are grown." "I do too. Say, fellows, feel and see if your feathers are grown." "Yes; yes," they hooted back. Then the command came: "Off to the woods through the darkness, and catch every thing that moves, except, crows, rabbits, and buzzards." One owl said: "No use of that command about the buzzards. I don’t stick my claws in him, any way, but keep my remark to yourself, for when he is insulted, he’s like a pole-cat. How about the rabbits?" "I regret that, but I want to see him run with his tail down, before I eat him."

So, as the day came the owls returned with rats, mice, lizzards, and snakes, and, what a pile they had! Then, here came a late owl with all that he could tote, and put it on top of all the other dead things, and said: "See what I have done? I had to kill him first." Then the buzzard lit and said: "I smell something dead." Then the shamed-face owl said: "That’s so, he was dead when I swiped him to bring him in." Such a pity for an owl to lie. He must have caught it from Satan. Then the owls said: "Buzzard, take that dead rooster, and this lying owl and eat them both, and it was done. Then the buzzard said: "I ate the owl that said he would not stick his claws in me. But now he’s inside and his claws out." Then the crows said: "If he ate all the liars among us, our bulk would burst him open."

Now the day for the rabbit race was tomorrow, but the rabbits said that it had been so long since the bet was made and the owls had so frightened them, and so many of them had their feelings hurt against the crows. So the counsel decided to let the rabbits bet over. So one rabbit bet the other a raw potato against his bed. Now that bed was lined with owl and crow feathers, and worth more than a raw potato. But, the rabbit who bet his nest was the one to run with his tail up, so he didn’t care, for he knew that he could beat any rabbit with the white of his tail covered up.

Everybody knew that the race would come off in one day. The distance to run was a mile. It was so noised abroad. The new hunters were there, but their dogs were not. The Jay birds were there but the old hunters were not. The rabbit who was to run with tail down was hard put to think how to keep it down. Even in a hop, when he took his mind off his tail, it would foy up. Then a crow said: "Trust in me, rabbit. I’ll have something here to hold your tail down before you start." An owl took the crow to one side, and said: "Crow, you should not foll that rabbit, whose tail is so short that nothing is long enough to hold it down." The crow said: "I’ve got something round enough to do it, a round ball of sweet-gum." So when the buzzard turned over, high up in the air, the signal to start in one minute, everything was ready and the crow said to the rabbit: "Hold your tail down." So the crow took his pill of sweet-gum and chewed it with the hair of the rabbit’s tail and they mixed, and down it stayed, and the race was on. Now the rabbit with his tail up, laid back his ears to burn the wind for one mile and win the potato. But he had a shock, to see the other rabbit shoot ahead in mighty leaps as though he was scared to death, and so won the race by 100 yards.

The up-tail rabbit cried out that there was a trick somewhere. "I never ran faster, and could always best this down-tail rabbit." "I am cheated out of my nest and ‘tater. A wave of discontent swept over the crowd for they had all bet on the up-tail rabbit, because the up-tail owl had beat the down-tail crow. It made the crowd madder when they learned that the crow who fixed the down-tail rabbit’s tail, had won. Now that crow was a rich crow, and they saw the down-tail rabbit sitting in the up-tail rabbit’s nest, eating his potato.

So they summoned the rich crow to stand trial. The crow said: "I only used a ball of sweet-gum to stick the hairs of his tail and thigh together. No trick in that." The reason the rabbit didn’t do it himself was for lack of sense to think of it." The big owl crowd said: "They are sluring us, but what can we do ---- nothing, but look wise, when you ain’t." So they felt sorry for themselves, and felt sorry for those others who had lost with them, and sat and worried.

Then the up-tail rabbit who had no potato or nest, hopped up in his poverty and said: "Fellow sufferers, beaten by a black crow by a trick, call that down-tail rabbit from my nest, to report how he did it. A ball of sweet-gum is not all of it." So the down-tail rabbit brought his tail and himself before them and said: "I did not know you thought so little of me to bet all you had on the up-tail rabbit. All that I remember was that when I started, I forgot that a crow had sweet-gummed my tail down, but thought it was a house-cat striking to make me his meat. The thought gave me terror to beat anything, running or flying. The point is well taken," said the buzzard. "The up-tail rabbit could have had a cat after him, the same way." Then a hawk made a motion to let the crows decide the question. So the crows consulted, and reported in favor of the down-tail rabbit, because, he had already eaten the potato,--- whereas the rabbits lay no eggs; therefore the nest is of no value to us crows. Then the up-tail rabbit stood on his hind legs, shouting defiance that it was a decision from a selfish standpoint. The buzzard said: "That’s true, but you have lost your potato and nest." Now, a little humming-bird, for there is no other kind, had peeped out from his nest, under a leaf, and had seen everything. So he pulled his head in, made up his mind to challenge the crowd to speed in the air, or in sucking honey from flowers.

So he slipped out and darted up to the buzzard poised in the air and transferred his challenge. So the buzzard turned over, which meant "attention," and said: "A humming-bird challenges the whole crowd of you to a contest to speed in the air, or in sucking honey from flowers, and bets his nest against yours." The crows said: "We will contest for any nest with eggs in it." All of the others were ashamed to let a humming-bird back them out. All said: "Our nests are gone, but we can have some fun, to lose them." The rabbits said: "How does that bird think we could suck honey with our noses?"

So, a day was set to meet in an open valley, a mile long, and hemned in by mountains. By this time people found out what fun rabbits and birds were having, and promised to leave their guns and whistles at home, if they could come. All the birds voted aye, but the rabbits. So man was invited. Birds have known men for ages, but some things about them, they had not known. They thought the people of Winder, and a few farmers would be all to bother them. But, when a woman knew it, the news spread that humming birds were to fly a race against crows, owls, and hawks, with rabbits running underneath, all nests at stake. Winder decided to go in mass, to encourage a home enterprise. All of Atlanta but two men, were coming. One of them was exhausted from fighting to change the constitution, and the other one, from trying to convict the President of the United States.

Now, the humming birds were favorites of Atlanta, knowing, how swift through the air they could dart, and knowing that they needed $10,000.00 to buy off their bootlegger. So, they staked $10,000.00 against Winder’s $10,000.00 on the big birds. The rule for the race was: "All is fair that can’t be seen. Big birds to fly low and little ones high. A thousand birds on each side." Now, the big birds had two buzzards, away high up in the air, stationed wide apart. Now the $20,000.00 was placed in the hands of the judges of the supreme court. They had decided that there was no law against betting on the flight of birds, and as they lived in Atlanta, they wanted that $10,000.00 and also, to teach Winder to stay in her own class.

Now, when all was ready, another buzzards turned over in the air and the race was on. A whir of wings, then a roar. A blurred streak shot up, high in the air, and black cloud underneath, going on the wings of the wind, to save their nest. Then the two buzzards stationed high up in the air, wide apart, let down an invisible hair net which held the humming birds a moment, and then turned them loose, to speed on to find, that they had lost the race. Now the two buzzards, high up in the air, had gone over the horizon, dropped the net, and came sailing back to see Atlanta pull it’s hair,which it did. The idea that a one horse town like Winder, should beat a city where lives the instructor of the president of the United States of America, on how to run the government. Atlanta also had an advocate, if heeded would take more of its sense away, and a wave to float Atlanta to the devil. Now the men of Winder had known Atlanta quite a while. So when the uproar was roaring, they stepped over to some men from Washington, whom the President had sent, and said: "Please get in your airplanes, quick, and take that $20,000.00 of ours to hold till Winder can think of some way to make our city more beautiful. Now when the three judges saw their money leave for Washington, they snatched some hair from the edge of their bald heads and summoned everything to court.

Now these judges were astute lawyers, and went to the heart of the matter at once, by having a wire stretched before them and every humming bird on it. The jury was ready and the trial began. "Now, you row of humming birds, who can fly like a bullet, but who let some crows and other birds beat you flying, and caused Atlanta to lose $10,000.00. Then one of the humming birds, whose long bill was better for drawing honey than talking, managed to say: "We were going through the air to victory, to give Atlanta $10,000.00, and run to win our nests for ourselves, but something held us up a moment, and we lost your money and our nests. We are in a bad fix, for the crows will ruin our nests with their big heads, to eat our eggs, which will make the next crop of humming birds short, for we have no heart and time to make new nests and lay new eggs. Did you birds see anything in the air?" They all said, "No but one who said he was behind and looked up over the others and saw two buzzards." "Bring those buzzards in," thundered the judges, and as the buzzards came in the people went out. Now you fellows, tell the court what you did." "We let down a net, which caused the humming birds to lose the race." The judges dismissed the little birds and ordered the buzzards to jail. "Judge," the buzzards said, it is a principle of law, not to condemn a man or buzzard before he is heard." "What have you to say?" asked the judge. "Read the terms of the race," which he did, turn the buzzard loose, and said to the jury: "GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY, YOU ARE DISMISSED, FOR ATLANTA HAS KISSED HER $10,000.00 GOODBYE."

FINIS.

Copyright © 2006 Brett W. Smith. All rights reserved.